Ever watch Bob Ross? He creates this beautiful background, trees, mountains…maybe a few birds….its beautiful and then all of a sudden – a giant tree! A GIANT TREE just right in the middle of this previously beautiful scene. Watching it, you are suddenly like a sports fan “Bob, what are you doing man? That mountain was so pretty!!”. With your head in your hands you continue to watch as Bob, this smiling afro god of complimentary colors, turns what you were sure was going to be devastating into an astounding piece of art (now retailing for thousands of dollars on eBay!).
So whats the point of all of this? Well if you haven’t put the first paragraph and the title together – the point is even if you thought something was a mistake, it might turn out to be supremely awesome. One of my earliest “mentees” ( I don’t know if thats a word) and I had a conversation years ago….and it seems relevant to bring up here.
When we make a mistake, I think a lot of people naturally pull away from trusting themselves. They blame themselves rather than learn from it. They assess their actions in hindsight rather than think about the information they had at the time. If you think of your trust in yourself as a table – you build the 4 legs of your foundation with trust in yourself, self assurance, self esteem, confidence etc. Whether it be a culmination of mistakes or one large mistake, the loss of trust in ourself kind knocks one of those legs out – and you are left a wobble-y table at best.
How do you recover? How do you rebuild this leg? You can’t just fold a napkin and stick it underneath. Honestly it depends, sometimes you might need to really have a conversation (or many) with a counselor – often times the interaction with an objective party can lead you to learn so much about yourself. Sometimes a conversation with a friend or just good old self reflection can help.
At the end of the day, everyone makes mistakes. You will make many. Over and over in your life mistakes will run amuck. It is up to you to turn the mistakes into a big beautiful tree or sit with your head in your hands wondering when Bob Ross will save you.